Crystal Chaos

I tried to upload it like 3 times! I dont know if it worked, I dont think it did. But let me know if you see it around k

I miss the part, when we were moving forward now
(On our way down)
But maybe someday, I'll be something more than love
Just know I'll never tell
And when you're on your way down
(Through the clouds)
And you're waiting for your body's re-entry again

We speak in different voices
When fighting with the ones we've loved
We speak in different voices
Why can't we say what we're thinking of

I'm missing parts, now that you've told me everything
(On our way down)
And I was blessed and I've forgotten how to love
You said you'd never tell
And when you're on your way down
(Through the clouds)
And you're waiting for your body's re-entry again

We speak in different voices
When fighting with the ones we've loved
We speak in different voices
Why can't we say what we're thinking of

Not even I will tell...

We speak in different voices
When fighting with the ones we've loved
We speak in different voices
We say these things to know they're real.

We speak in different voices
When fighting with the ones we've loved
We speak in different voices
Why can't we say what we're thinking of

We speak in different voices
When fighting with the one's we've loved
We speak in different voices
We speak in different voices

To know they're real. Real.
I'll never tell.

Bury your head,
Bury your head,

I was feeling fine,
You’ll be coming clean tonight,
And I’ll be falling down with you once again,
Call me your valentine call me once tonight,
And I will have said it's okay,

The things you said, I’m rehearsing them,
(The things you said, The things you said)
The things you said, I’m rehearsing them,

They went back on us,
(Until his eyes rolled back couldn't step it up),
I could know when to come on to it,
It’s the thought that emerges,
(Take back couldn't step it up),
I could never love the ion change,

Bury your head, and the child smashed you down,
And the psalms will soon recall me again,
(Fall down below),
I’ll sleep tonight when you're okay,
And I haven't said it's okay,

The things you said, I’m rehearsing them,
The things you said, I’m rehearsing them,

They went back on us,
(Until his eyes rolled back couldn't step it up),
I could know when to come on to it,
It’s the thought that emerges,
(Take back couldn't step it up),
I could never love the ion change.

They have been the ones who’ve seen enough,
This is what you call love,

They stole my lies,
Sold right and all,
They wandered around and round my mouth,
They stole my lie,
Sold right and all,
(Stole it all, Stole it all),
They have been the ones who’ve seen enough,

They went back on us,
(Until his eyes rolled back couldn't step it up),
I could know when to come on to it,
It’s the thought that emerges,
(Take back couldn't step it up),
I could never love the ion change,

You'll be coming clean tonight...

DEADSTAR ASSEMBLY LYRICS

"Dejected"

You swept me under the bed
Now the ugliness rears it's head unshed
This darkening I'm over it
You've made me what I am today
Disgust is what you've raised unsaid
My awakening is far from dead

So I'm not like you
No I'm not like you
Dejected for most of my life
So I'm not like you
No I'm not like you
So I'm crucified

I'm losing my faith
I'm hurting to feel
I'm searching and there's no one else here
If learning to hate is learning to feel
This life is so unreal
Abusing me again
Dejected rejected

A bad seed an utter degenerate
Stained with your neglect unfed
The blackest sheep irrelevant
You made the stigma I enslave
Disgust in what youve raised unsaid
My awakening is far from dead

So I'm not like you
No I'm not like you
Dejected for most of my life
So I'm not like you
No I'm not like you
So I'm crucified

I'm losing my faith
I'm hurting to feel
I'm searching and there's no one else here
If learning to hate is learning to feel
This life is so unreal
Abusing me again
Abusing me again

I'm losing my faith
I'm hurting to feel
I'm searching and there's no one else here
If learning to hate is learning to feel
This life is so unreal
Abusing me again
Abusing me again
Abusing me again
This life is so unreal
Dejected rejected

DEADSTAR ASSEMBLY LYRICS

"Killing Myself Again"

Every page of my suicide script
They all have a cross to bear
Like a hammer to the teeth
Answer my misguided prayer

Watch it kill you, watch it kill me
My hypocrisy is so sincere
Each dose of delusion
Becomes a feeding frenzy

Carving this message into my skin
Haunting me
This isn't the way I want to live
It's killing me
It's killing me
Carving this message into my skin
With not one shit left to give
I don't know if I'm gonna be
It's killing me
It's killing me to live

Killing myself again
Killing myself again
Killing myself again
I'm killing myself to live
Killing myself again
Killing myself again
Killing myself again
I kill myself to live

Carving this message into my skin
Haunting me
This isn't the way I want to live
It's killing me
It's killing me
Carving this message into my skin
With not one shit left to give
I don't know if I'm gonna be
It's killing me
It's killing me to live

Killing myself again
Killing myself to live
Killing myself again
Killing myself to live
I'm killing
I'm killing
I'm killing
I'm killing myself to live

Carving this message into my skin
Haunting me
This isn't the way I want to live
It's killing me
It's killing me
Carving this message into my skin
With not one shit left to give
I don't know if I'm gonna be
It's killing me
It's killing me to live

DEADSTAR ASSEMBLY LYRICS

"Send Me An Angel"

Send me an angel
Send me an angel
Right now
Right now
Send me an angel
Send me an angel
Right now
Right now

Do you believe in heaven in above
Do you believe in love
Don't tell a lie
Don't be false or untrue
It all comes back to you
Open fire on my burning heart
I've never been lucky in love
My defenses are down
A kiss or a frown
I can't survive on my own
If a girl walks in
And carves her name in my heart
I'll turn and run away
Everyday we've all been lead astray
It's hard to be lucky in love

It gets in your eyes
It's making you cry
Don't know what to do
Don't know what to do
Looking for love
Calling heaven above
Send me an angel
Send me an angel
Right now
Right now
Send me an angel
Send me an angel
Right now
Right now

Empty dreams can only disappoint
In a room behind your smile
But don't give up
Don't give up
You can be lucky in love

It gets in your eyes
It's making you cry
Don't know what to do
Don't know what to do
Looking for love
Calling heaven above
Send me an angel
Send me an angel
Right now
Right now
Send me an angel
Send me an angel
Right now
Right now

Send me an angel
Send me an angel
Right now
Right now
Right now

DEADSTAR ASSEMBLY LYRICS

"Breathe For Me"

Listen to
Listen to me
I need you
A disaster's waiting to happen
These are the things I can't see through
When I'm saddened

It's not me
It's not me
Just give me some room to breathe
Or breathe for me
Breathe for me

Is this what it's about
I've reached for the strength to hold out
I'm leaving
The tears keep burning my eyes
And I have lost the strength to keep this alive

It's not me
It's not me
Just give me some room to breathe
Or breathe for me
Breathe for me
Breathe for me

I can't explain what I feel
But I know it's for real
Don't let me go back down

It's not me
It's not me
Just give me some room to breathe
Or breathe for me
Its not me
Its not me
Just give me some room to breathe
Or breathe for me
Or breathe for me

it may be long but at the end you might want to cry!!


One 16year old boy Michael and a 16 year old girl Sarah fell deeply in love since the very first day they met. They both lived in California but the girl had just moved there a year ago but fell for him so fast. Michael played on her dads football team he was the best player on the team and her dad saw him as a son of his own. Sarah was a cheerleader on the team and had everything she ever wanted. Until one day......her life crashes.

Mom: Wake up honey.. Michaels downstairs waiting for you.
Sarah: Oh my gosh.. I woke up to late I still need a shower and everything.
Right when she said that Michael walked into her room smiling from ear to ear.

Michael: No baby.. you're beautiful just like that now come on Im starven.
Sarah: Okay.
Sarah got out of bed put on some clothes and took his hand and walked out the door to his car and got in.

Sarah: Where are we going.. remember I have to be home by 1 .. i got cheerleaden practice and you have football.
Michael: I know..
Then Sarah noticed that Michael was really pale like he was sick or something.

Sarah: Michael are you feeling okay.. you look like you're sick?
Michael: yeah it's just my allergies.
Sarah: are you sure.. did you go to the doctors the other day?
Michael: yeah.. they just said take some allergie pills and I'll be okay.
Sarah turned to look away from Michael.. she knew there was something more than just allergies. She has allergies and she doesn't look like that. Then he reached out and held her hand.

Sarah: Ohh.. Michael your hands are cold. I dont think you're okay tell me whats really wrong..do you need to go back?
Michael: i promise you baby everything is okay..they told me to come back tomorrow but I aint going because theres nothing wrong with me.
Sarah: Michael you need to go...if they told you to then there is something wrong.
Michael let go of her hand and turned back to the road and didnt talk to her the rest of the way. Sarah just looked at him. They finally pullled up to the resturaunt and ate breakfast.

Michael: did you bring your cheerleading stuff or do we have to go back to your house to get it?
Sarah: No I have it....do you really think you should go to football like that ?
Michael: yes Sarah I'm fine.
Sarah: if you say so...
Michael:Sarah baby would I lie to you?
Sarah: no...
They got back in the car and went to the feild they got out and started practicen. Sarah was cheerleading and then out of no where they hear a boy yell..."HE'S NOT MOVING SOMEONE CALL 911..HELP COACH". Right when she heard that she turned around and saw Michael on the ground just laying there not moving. She ran to him and her dad pushed her back.
Dad: no honey you shouldnt be right here..
Sarah started to cry...
Sarah: daddy what happened is he ok?
Dad: honey just please go back with your coach
Sarah walked back and sat on the bench while the ambulance came and took him away. She got in the car with her dad and they went to the hospital. When they got there his mom was already there and talking to the Doctor. They walked over and listened.....

Doctor:You may want to sit down for this....
Michaels Mom: Is he okay?
Doctor: Mam..your son has lukiemia.....we can put him on treatments..but he might not make it because was caught it to late.
Sarah was shocked and began to cry on here dads shoulder.

Michaels Mom: what kind of treatments?
Doctor: well the treatments will cause loss of hair... but it will help slow the cancer down
Michaels Mom: but he's certain to die?
Doctor: well yeah.. but we have had this surgery to clear out the clogs.. but its possible he will not make it.
Michaels Mom: I understand... I will have to talk to him about this...can we see him now?
Doctor: one at a time though

Michaels mom looked over at Sarah and hugged her tight she knew that Sarah loved him with all her heart.

Michael's Mom: you go first sweetheart
Sarah: are you sure?
Michael's Mom: yes honey...

Sarah walks slowly to his room and turned the knob. She just stood looking at him laying there weak. He was so pale and he had cords hooked up to him and everything it was painful for her to look at him. Michael looked at her and weakly smiled at her. She went over and kneeled down beside of him.
Michael: did they already tell you?
Sarah: yes...
Michael: im sorry Sarah... i didnt want you to find out like this..
Sarah: it's ok I understand Michael....
Michael: baby I love you...(he ran his fingers through her hair)
Sarah: i love you to Michael.. with all my heart.. and I will be here for you till the end.
Michael: Im going to be okay Sarah...
The nurse walked in with Michaels mom.
Nurse: Its her turn now..

Michael looked at Sarah.....
Michael: bye baby....
Sarah: bye (she softly kissed him)

Months went by and Michael lost his hair but they was still deeply in love and Sarah was by him everyday. Michael was getting worse and he couldnt even play football and the championship game was coming up. Michael was sitting at Sarahs house with her dad and mom and her.

Michael: coach.. I wanna play tomorrow
Dad: Michael i know.. you're the best player..but I cant do that.. you'll get hurt.
Michael: No coach please this might be the last time on the feild for me.. please I wanna be able to play one more time.
Dad looked at Michael and then at Sarah.

Dad: you're a strong boy Michael and very brave....i think we can do this.
Michael: thank you so much coach.
Dad: no problem.. so what are you two doing tonight?
Michael: i wanna show Sarah something if thats ok
Dad: of course you two be careful.
Michael took Sarahs hand and lead her outside to his car. It was completely dark outside when he pulled up the football feild.

Sarah: what are we doing here?
Michael: come on
Michael grabbed a blanket and laid it down onto the feild and they both laid there looking at the stars.

Sarah: this is beautiful
Michael: I do this often.. i wanted to show you the place I love ...
Sarah: i understand Michael .. do you remember the flowers you gave me when you first asked me out?
Michael: sure do i gave you lillies your favorite.
Sarah: yeah...best day of my life...
Michael: i want you to always remember something Sarah
Sarah: what?
Michael: I will always be with you.. and I love you.. you're my baby...
Sarah: i love you to
Michael: and I want you to be happy.. I want you to marry someone have kids make a family live a happy life for me.
Sarah: no i will never marry anyone.. im marrien you Michael
Michael: i love you so much
Michael raised up and kissed her. She pushed him off and jumped up

Sarah: you still think you can catch me??
Michael: oh yeah.. im stronger than what I look
Sarah: then come on
Michael stood up and chaised her around the football feild and finally caught her. He laid on top of her and put her hands behind her head and held her there so she couldnt move. Then it started to rain and they were getting soaked but they didnt care Michael looked deep into her eyes.

Michael: whos the weak one now huh?
Sarah: Me (she giggled)
Michael: Remember what you told me that night when we was at dinner?
Sarah: no what?
Michael: you have always wanted to kiss in the rain with someone you love.
Sarah: yeah?
Michael: well your wish is my comand.
Michael leaned down and kissed her passionalty with all he had. He pulled away.

Michael: you're so beautiful
Sarah: you're such a good kisser (she laughed..so did he)
Michael: I better get you home
They got into the car and went home. It was hard for them to sleep that night but they did. It was finally the big day and they were all at the football field. Michael had on everything and Sarah was out there cheeren him on. The game begin.. the crowd was going wild for Michael and Sarah was cheeren her lil heart out for him. The score was 36 to 36. All they had to do was make one more point and they would win. Michael had the ball he ran with all he had he made it to the touchdown line and threw the ball down he had made a touch down everyone was cheering. They had won the game.. but for Michael he may have lost his life. He fell to the ground trien to catch his breath. Sarah ran to him and kneeled down over him. He looked up at her gasping for breath everyone was headen to feild.. Then her dad stood up
Dad: Back away.. give them a moment please...thats my daughters love

Michael gently raised his hand touched her whiped her tears away.

Sarah: dont die Michael.. i need you.. I love you..
Michael: i told you this was my dream to win the championship.. to be in the big game.. to die on this feild... i made history
Sarah leaned down and kissed him knowing this was the last she will ever kiss him last time she would ever talk to him she had so much to say but didnt have time.

Michael: I love you baby...........tell mom i love her to..and tell coach thanks
Sarah: I love you Michael so much..
Michael: ill wait for you..
Michaels hand dropped and he let go.. he died that night on the football feild. Sarah cried for 2months straight... Sarah was lien in her bed when her dad walked in.

Dad: honey its been 2months... please get up.. he would want you to have fun and be happy..
Sarah: i know
Dad: guess what
Sarah: what
Dad: they are builden a new stadium aint that great honey come on I want you to come with me... before they tear the old one down..
Sarah got up and went with her dad they climbed to the to of the bleachers and looked down.

Sarah: its like it was just yesterday he was out there throwen the football maken the touchdown.
Her dad wrapped his arms around when she began to cry.

Dad: i know baby.. I know
Then Sarah noticed something on the feild.

Sarah: whats that daddy look?
Dad: look like flowers blooming.
Sarah: oh my gosh daddy stop them dont let them tear this down please.. Michael planted me something.
Her dad ran down there and stopped them.
Weeks later the flowers had bloomed and her dad and her went and looked at it... They were lillies that left a message saying "I Love You".

If you have any heart at all and love someone this much repost this

its,  warpedchick4life@msn.com.

LEAVE SOME COMMENTS PPL!!!!!!

I dont kno y. but i had a good charlotte obsession mode last week. ok, its over

4 the love of God!!!!! If you love Joel, you'll know hes a cool person, and if he likes Hillary than she must be a cool person too right?!!!!!!!! Joel isnt stupid!!!!! And yeah u h8 her music, I do too but that has nothing to do with her as a person!!!! U'r just mad cuz she has Joel and you want him. I dont mean to be bitchy, but golly!!! You dont even know Hilary. AND THIS IS DIRECTED TO EVERYONE!!!!!!!!!!

post comments on my pics. Im bored -_-

Yesterday I cut my wrist, but something was different. Usually blood came pouring out, but this time it only came out in little drips. I dont know why, but it made me feel happy. I've been told by many adults that I was crazy, maybe they're right.

All the little pieces falling, shadder

shards of me, too sharp to put back togethor

too small to matter

but big enough to cut me in so many little pieces

if I try to touch him than I bleed

I bleed

and I breath, no more

Earth is a part of Hell!

Do you think that if you quit doing the things that defined you as a person, that you would stop being that person?

ANYONE WHO SENDS ME A CHAIN LETTER IS OFF MY FRIEND LIST!!!!!!!!! I DONT CARE ABOUT PPL'S LITTLE MYSPACE OR RAPEING PROBLEMS, I DONT MEEN TO BE A BITCH BUT THESE CHAIN LETTERS ARE WASTEING MY LIFE!!

4 friends who wanna contact me, my cell# is 240 515 4023! leave me a message if Im noy there k ^_^

My myspace screen name is underoathgirl777 . ^_^